ModMic Uni 2+

My experience with headphones, headsets, etc is that you're best served by a) an external DAC and dedicated headphones and b) a separate, dedicated mic. There are a lot of super expensive lapel mics out there which might suit you but I used a modmic for years without issue. They have several options but the cheapest, analog option is probably fine. For sound quality/headphone choice you're going to have to choose between >open ear (probably not what you're looking for considering you and your wife are right next to each other) OR >closed ear headphones I've had good experience with Audiotechnica monitors but if you're looking for a more gamer-y EQ there are other decent options they offer. A decent setup that won't break the bank is a pair of closed audiotechnicas, analog modmic, and a schiit fulla external DAC. Should run you about 250 dollars-ish but I promise getting dedicated headphones instead of a headset will last you much longer and generally sound better. Also, any dedicated microphone software is likely going to be nearly useless. You're literally fighting the laws of physics trying to isolate your voice from your wife's. The only way I could feasibly see you doing this is with a microphone that is right next to your mouth. If you have Nvidia (I do not so I can't verify this) they have RTX voice which might offer some more robust cancellation/recognition. AMD has something similar I believe but I don't use it so YMMV. Most voice chat apps also have built in features to isolate noise. All you can really do is tune the sensitivity to be very, very low and hope for the best.

ModMic Staff here, so my answers will be 100% biased, but I'll do my best to answer the non-bias related parts of the questions: Short version of pros and cons of lav mics vs. attachable mics is primarily three things, one of which I won't give my opinion on: Sound Quality Contact Points Noise/Movement Sound quality, that I am going to pass on. You can listen to test recordings on YouTube. :) Contact Points: A lav mic is positioned near your chest/shirt collar typically. A ModMic will be the left or right side of your VR visor. I don't think there's a way to quantify better here, just know that smashing your controller around near your chest or face is going to come into contact with the mic (whichever one you use). Noise/Movement: A lav mic is going to be more prone to picking up clothing movement. Depending on what you wear and how careful you are with movement and setup each time you connect it, this may not be an issue at all. The ModMic is going to always be unaffected by these things, BUT will be more prone to any issues you could encounter with its attachment or parts wearing over time. We have an awesome support team ready to help anyone who encounters a rattle or other mechanical noise when using their ModMic in VR. Sometimes it requires a part replacement after heavy use. I think that covers pretty much all of the core differences between the two choices. Finally, your question on how to connect these things. I believe they all use USB, so that is what you should be using. Even if you could connect the lav mics via 3.5mm (aux input) you'd want to stay away from it. The standard mic input to a PC uses what is called an unbalanced cable; as opposed to XLR which is balanced. An unbalanced cable is more prone to picking up electrical noise, which will come across as a background hiss, hum, or buzz; and occasionally much worse. USB is far less prone to this kind of issue. There are a lot of good reasons to like 3.5mm input, but USB is a heck of a lot easier :). PS: ModMic Wireless is USB-A for the receiver, you may need a USB-A to C converter. The ModMic USB 2 (Wired USB) has a USB-A to C adapter included.

I run HD6XX's with an external mic (a modmic turns them into a great headset). I almost exclusively use them for gaming at this point, but they're phenomenal headphones as well. The HD58X's are excellent as well and easier to drive. Both headphones are around $200 on Drop, give or take sales they have going on. I'm sure they'll have something going on for black friday.

the 560s is good, just slap a antlion modmic on there and ur good to go

Antlion modmic is your frien.

Modmic from antlion is the goto option, but is it really worth it to drop money on a mic that costs almost as much as your headset? [This cheaper alternative might be better suited for your needs as it doesn't require as big of an investment](https://youtu.be/K9npz2hxPYM)

Understood, it's just that headset mics are going to probably get you into the 30-40 range, not 75, even spending a few hundred bucks. That Audio-Technica I'd mentioned is one of the best, but Sennheiser has a few that sound pretty decent. You could also go for something like an Antlion Modmic actually, and stick it on your existing headset. I'd recommend against the wireless version (sounds worse than the wired, uses mini-USB for charging, some other issues).