NeoAir XLite (OG Version w Classic Valve)

That pad you linked does have almost identical specs to the 5R. Sometimes looks can be deceiving though. I've used an older Thermarest Xlite for a while as well as a Paria Recharge XL. The horizontal baffles aren't bad, but I've found the vertical baffles to kinda cradle you in the sleeping pad a little more. So I'm less prone to wake up half in the floor in the middle of the night.

I have the old neoair xlite, not my favorite but I hear the new one is a lot better. However, since you said you’re pretty new and the quarter pound difference in weight isn’t a concern, I’d go for the one people say is more comfortable, the tensor. I can’t imagine you’ll regret it, though on this sub you’re always going to get the recommendation to go with the lightest option

I’ve slept on a regular (non women’s) Xlite on relatively warm ground but at temps in the upper teens for two nights. Had a 20 degree quilt and a puffy on. Didn’t really feel like I was cold on my back side or anything. I’d think I could certainly do it again and be warmer on the women’s version. Also I think gender matters here, I am a dude and I think there’s science that says men sleep warmer than women so ymmv if you are the fairer sex.

The current pad I use is an older 25" xlite that was chopped just below my knees and re-welded. It's my favorite, being 2.5" tall. The crinkling does annoy me and wake me up out of my sleep sometimes though.

Xlite large user-2.5" version. My hands only go numb when they fall off the pad, not side sleeping. I keep it inflated pretty hard. I never bottom out either. My hands did go numb, while sleeping on my back, before I went to a wide pad. 170lbs/77.1kg FWIW.

We have therma rest inflatable backpacking mattresses (neoair and my 10+ year old pre-neo pad) , that we take car camping aswell. I often lay out more blankets on top, especially if we have my 4yo stepson with us. 3 pads, 2-3 layers of comfy blankets and then we can basically use sleaping bags as top covers, or individually, or whatever we feel like.. It might help though that while we cuddle/snuggle a lot, we don't generally touch each other that much while actually sleeping due to overheating. I can tolerate it more though, so I get stuck with kiddo near me haha.

How cold is it going to be? I have a thermarest neoair (a couple versions as purchased over the last 10 years) and previously only used the Coleman mats like you have there. I find the inflatable pads far more comfortable. My suggestion would be to find an inflatable pad in "wide" and there are varying insulation levels (R value). It won't me AS tiny as the klymit but much smaller than the Coleman. About nalgene size . Thermarest, big Agnes and a bunch of other brands make them in wide.

I'd recommend a thermarest xtherm and a 0 degree quilt for what you are looking for. A sleeping pad with a very high R value like the xtherm means you can get away with a little less sleeping bag/quilt and still be very comfortable all while being quite light amd packable You'll also have some decent insurance if you get an unusually cold night if you sleep in am extra layer. You could alternativley do a thermarest neoair on top of a accordian style mat for a similar R value and extra insurance if the air mattress fails For quilts you cant go wrong with enlightened equipmemt. I have a 900 fill goose down 0 degree quilt and it is extremely packable Do yourself a favour if you go down the thermarest air mattress get the wide 25inch version of each the small bit of extra weight is so worth it compared to the difference in comfort the extra wodth makes